PRECIOUS MOMENTS

Life is nothing but a limited number of moments and each moment is slipping by. right now, a moment just passed by me, and took me closer to death, leaving me with lesser time to smile, to crack some poor joke, to see my people laugh, to be a good person, to live, to see a friend find the happiness they deserve.

Around me. I see people I care for. Sometimes I see them sad .I see them clinging to bad memories , things which they cannot change , things which still hurt them , things which make tears flow down their cheeks. and the very thought of letting such a precious moment drown in a tear leaves me restless. I know they are hurt and have reasons to feel sad. But life is not forever. Why do we people hurt each other , when this life may not be long enough to love each other ?

You might wonder how come this sudden change from the crap I normally write, to something this serious. I hate families that fight. Ive seen too many broken families.. too many brothers and sisters who wont talk to each other. I’ve lost an older bro, a younger bro and my baby sister. I’ve lost too many precious moments letting them just go by. Never taking time to talk to them or be with them. Now Its hard to be the only one my parents have.

even when I die. I want to see my end surrounded by my loved ones. I want my hand to go limp in the hands of a loved one. I don’t want anyone else to do the hard part of telling my father that he’s lost another child. The last two times I did..!! , the worst thing I’ve ever told my dad. No failed marksheets, no stolen 5 ruppees.. nothing compared to that day I told him about my baby sister ..and then Aaron. I don’t know what’s worse they die first or me !! I don’t think my parents would survive another shock anyway.

Yet I live away from them. So that someday the pain of separation might not be as hard as its meant to be. So if you think you’re living it good right now.. consider living better soon!!

Maybe you need to know that death is a surprisingly unexpected reality.
Maybe you need to know that you may never get a chance to be the nice person you want to be.
Maybe you need to know that the moment you have been waiting for to tell someone how much you love them may never arrive.
Maybe you need to know that you may never have the time to wipe off the tears you are causing today.
Maybe you need to start living the life you should.

I love my folks and a few other people. But I feel, too much attachment causes pain to all. I care a lot for them but I don’t want to possess anyone now. I would give my life for them , I don’t want to own their lives. I just want to let go. I just don’t want to cling to anything. Maybe I fear losing it. Sometimes I feel I have forgotten to love. Sometimes it seems I have found what true love is only now. People say I am turning away from them. I feel I am turning in to myself.