August 29, 2006

A LITTLE SUGAR FOR YOU DEAR NEIGHBOUR !!

3:00 am

Im trying to get some sleep. I’ve buried my face in the pillow and used another to cover my ears. but I can still hear it... ofcourse i can.. why wont i ? its dead of night. you can't miss a pin drop with this kind of silence !!.. there it is again... “If I had to.." ..... "live my life without you near me, The days would all be empty, and nights would seem so long”.

I mean what the ***k. doesn’t she wanna sleep or something. Its been like this for over 3 hours now. Hey ‘loving’ neighbour honestly if I had to live my life without you near me I’d be asleep by now. And if your so desperately in love try these things I just came up with. It’ll do me (if not your lover) a lot good.


At this particular time i am going to share with you new ways to go and kill yourself when you feel the need to. For which I think theres never gonna be a moment better then now. Not that i wish you to do so, but just incase.

let's get with the suicide stuff right away.
If you ever find yourself on the way to some place, say a park! with your lover, and you just feel like showing him some love, here's what you do. Tell him you’ll die for him.. Wait until you’ll pull up to parkway. Once you’ve stopped open the door and run as fast as you can backwards towards the fastest coming SUV. Upon impact you will find yourself flying rather rapidly through the air for say about 40 to 50 feet until you and maybe some of your other parts come to an adbrupt halt on the parkway itself. As you fly throught the air try to glimpse back at your boyfriend to try and catch the look of horror upon his face, that would make it all worth while.

Or Let's say you just aren't feeling "it" anymore, what do you do? What do you do ?!?! Simple, go ahead an take yourself an overdose of medication. That should do the trick. But wait. . .it didn't. So now what? Why not find the nearest bed sheet, tie it around something sturdy like a bedpost or maybe a bedframe. Now tie the other end around your neck. Look for the window and jump out, thereby hanging yourself. Don't worry about someone finding you and saving you because daddy will not hear the thud of you hitting the siding with those love songs playing so loud.

So there yah have it. Mind you i am not endorsing suicide nor am i telling you to do so. Whoever said "Love your neighbour" surely didnt have a neighbour like mine.

5 comments:

Kari said...

interesting....i like the SUV story best...bt i'd have to find someone to do tht infront of n i dun think tht's ever gonna happen...lol

KD13 said...

Another post on ur fascinating neighbour...LOL

fedes said...

naw man. i don't think suicide is funny- even in a sarcy way.

Sarah said...

I agree with "fedes". Totally unusual how you came up with that man...

Parul said...

LOL!!!
I love ur neighbour!